Fake Love and Flying Monkeys
A Toxic relationship and Fake love looks real—until it destroys you.
Welcome to Fake Love and Flying Monkeys, the podcast that exposes the hidden dynamics of toxic relationships, narcissistic abuse, and emotional manipulation. Hosted by Nova Gibson, leading trauma-informed counsellor and Director of Brighter Outlook Narcissistic Abuse Counselling, this podcast is your guide to breaking free from the confusion, fear, and self-doubt that come with being entangled with a narcissist.
In every episode, Nova draws from years of experience working with survivors to explore the complex, often covert tactics used in emotionally abusive relationships—from gaslighting, triangulation, and the silent treatment to smear campaigns and intermittent reinforcement.
Whether you're struggling with a narcissistic partner, parent, boss, or friend, Fake Love and Flying Monkeys gives you the tools and knowledge to understand the abuse, trust your instincts, and reclaim your power—even if the narcissist has never been formally diagnosed.
This is more than a podcast—it’s a lifeline.
You’ll get:
Clear explanations of narcissistic behaviour patterns
Practical strategies for setting boundaries and detaching
Real talk about the emotional rollercoaster of trauma bonding
Validation, clarity, and a path toward healing from narcissistic abuse
If you've ever felt trapped in a relationship that chips away at your self-worth, this podcast will help you name it, face it, and finally break free.
You’re not alone, and you’re not crazy. You’re in the fog of narcissistic abuse—and Nova is here to help guide you out.
Visit https://www.brighteroutlooknarcissisticabusecounselling.com.au/
for more support and resources.
It’s time to expose the fake love, silence the flying monkeys, and rewrite your story.
Fake Love and Flying Monkeys
Understanding Narcissism and Flying Monkeys in Narcissistic Abuse
What is a Narcissist? It's just a buzzword to many, but for the victims, it's a devastating, often very covert form of abuse that destroys their lives, and their is little support and understanding for them.
In this 1st full length episode I explain what a narcissist actually is. It's become a buzzword and so many people use the word without knowing the true meaning, which minimises the trauma of victims and makes it hard for them to get support.
The behaviours and traits of the narcissist that we discuss in this episode are NOT isolated incidents. They are consistent patterns of behaviour over space and time, and they're 100% intentional!
We also answer the question "What is a Flying Monkey, and how the narcissist uses them to abuse you.
I unpack....
* What is a narcissist?
* Covert vs Overt Narcissists
* Who can be a narcissist?
* What if I don't have a diagnosis
*Can the narcissist change?
*Who and what are Flying Monkeys?
* Who can be a Flying Monkey?
* Are all Flying Monkeys toxic?
*Should I go no contact with the Flying Monkeys as well?
🎧 Tune in now and learn how to stop the manipulation before it controls you! Don't forget to subscribe, leave a review, and share this episode with anyone dealing with narcissistic abuse. Your healing starts with knowledge—and I’m here to guide you every step of the way.
You can leave a rating and a review here ❤️
Nova xx
Need Support? You can book a Telehealth Online zoom counseling appointment with me or book me to speak at your event through my website Brighter Outlook Counselling Service or email me at nova.pollard123@gmail.com
You can purchase a copy of my book ‘Fake Love – Understanding and Healing from narcissistic Abuse here
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Need Support, Extra Resources? Resources and Online Counseling (worldwide) information Here
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Thank you for listening!
Please remember the information in this episode is not intended to substitute for therapy is general and strictly the opinions of the host.
Nova xx
Understanding Narcissism and Flying Monkeys in Narcissistic Abuse
In this podcast, we deeply explore the definitions of a narcissist and unravel the concept of "flying monkeys," crucial for understanding the complexities of narcissistic abuse and its profound impacts on victims.
The Misuse of the Term ‘Narcissist’: The term "narcissist" has permeated popular culture, often used loosely to describe anyone exhibiting self-centered behavior. This widespread misuse diminishes the experiences of true victims of narcissistic abuse, who face skepticism and dismissal when trying to identify and address their abusers accurately. Educating the public about the clinical definition of narcissism is vital for fostering empathy and support for those affected.
Defining a Narcissist: At the core, a narcissist is characterized by an inflated sense of self-importance, an insatiable need for admiration, and a marked lack of empathy for others. They manipulate and exploit relationships to meet their own needs, viewing others as tools for their gratification rather than as individuals with their own emotions and desires. While they may display superficial charm and empathy (known as cognitive empathy) to manipulate others, their genuine emotional connection is typically shallow or nonexistent.
The Nine Traits of Narcissistic Personality Disorder (NPD): Narcissistic Personality Disorder (NPD) is diagnosed based on the presence of specific traits, including grandiosity, a sense of entitlement, a constant need for admiration, and a tendency to exploit others for personal gain. While narcissists may exhibit some of these traits, they often resist seeking professional help or diagnosis, believing themselves to be superior and beyond reproach.
The Prevalence of Narcissism: Accurate statistics on the prevalence of NPD are challenging to ascertain because many narcissists do not seek mental health treatment voluntarily. Instead, it is often those affected by their behavior—such as partners, family members, or colleagues—who seek therapy to cope with the emotional and psychological fallout of narcissistic abuse. This disparity in seeking help underscores the covert nature of narcissistic behavior and its impact on interpersonal relationships.
Trusting Your Instincts: Victims of narcissistic abuse frequently endure gaslighting—a form of psychological manipulation that causes them to doubt their perceptions, memories, and sanity. Trusting one's instincts becomes crucial for recognizing the signs of abuse, even in the absence of a formal diagnosis. Empowering victims to trust their gut feelings and seek validation from supportive individuals or professionals is essential for breaking free from the cycle of manipulation and control.
The Role of Flying Monkeys: Coined from "The Wizard of Oz," the term "flying monkeys" refers to individuals who the narcissist enlists to do their bidding and perpetuate their agenda. These individuals may act out of genuine loyalty, coercion, or ignorance of the narcissist's manipulative tactics. Flying monkeys serve as extensions of the narcissist's influence, often spreading misinformation, undermining the victim's credibility, or directly participating in abusive behaviors on behalf of the narcissist.
Conclusion: Understanding the complexities of narcissism and the role of flying monkeys is crucial for identifying and addressing narcissistic abuse effectively. By educating oneself and others about the clinical aspects of narcissistic behavior and its impact on relationships, society can better support victims and hold perpetrators accountable. If you or someone you know is experiencing narcissistic abuse, seeking professional help and validation is paramount. Contact Nova for confidential support, resources, and guidance on navigating narcissistic relationships and reclaiming personal well-being.