Fake Love and Flying Monkeys

The Narcissist's Silent Treatment: Emotional Abuse that destroys you!

Nova Gibson Season 2 Episode 12

The Narcissist's Silent  Treatment: Emotional Abuse that destroys you!

If you’ve ever been ignored by a narcissist, you know just how devastating the silent treatment can be. It’s not just “being ignored.” It’s psychological torture. It makes you feel invisible, worthless, and desperate for validation. It’s a passive-aggressive mind game designed to punish and control you, and it’s one of the most emotionally painful tactics narcissists use.

In this episode, we’re diving deep into the narcissist’s silent treatment—why they do it, how it affects you, and, most importantly, how you can protect yourself.

If you’ve ever felt the crushing weight of a narcissist’s silence, this episode is for you. Tune in now and take the first step toward breaking free.


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Please remember the information you hear in this episode is not intended to substitute for therapy, is general information, and strictly the opinions of the host based on her years of experience working with thousands of victims of narcissistic abuse.

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Understanding the Silent Treatment: A Narcissist’s Tool for Control

If you’ve ever been in a relationship with a narcissist, you’ve probably experienced the dreaded silent treatment—a form of emotional abuse designed to control, punish, and break you down.

What Is the Silent Treatment?

The silent treatment is a manipulative tactic where the narcissist completely ignores you—refusing to talk, acknowledge your presence, or give you any emotional response. It’s a cruel and calculated way to make you feel invisible, unworthy, and desperate for their validation. They know exactly how painful it is, and they use it to keep you under their control.

Why Do Narcissists Use the Silent Treatment?

A narcissist thrives on power and control. When you start questioning them or setting boundaries, they withdraw completely, making you feel like you’re the problem. The longer they ignore you, the more desperate you become to “fix” things—even though you’ve done nothing wrong. This cycle strengthens the trauma bond, keeping you emotionally trapped.

How the Silent Treatment Affects You

The silent treatment is more than just an argument—it’s psychological warfare. It leaves victims feeling:

  • Anxious and constantly on edge
  • Rejected and unworthy
  • Confused about what they did wrong
  • Dependent on the narcissist for emotional relief
  • Physically sick due to stress, lack of sleep, and isolation

Over time, victims start blaming themselves, thinking, “If I hadn’t upset them, they wouldn’t have left.” This is exactly what the narcissist wants—to make you believe you’re the problem when in reality, they’re the one controlling you.

Silent Treatment vs. No Contact: What’s the Difference?

Many survivors of narcissistic abuse worry that going no contact makes them just as bad as the narcissist. But there’s a major difference:

  • The silent treatment is punishment. The narcissist disappears to make you feel guilty, weak, and desperate for their return.
  • No contact is self-protection. It’s about cutting ties to heal, rebuild your confidence, and break free from the emotional manipulation.

Going no contact isn’t about getting revenge—it’s about reclaiming your life.

How to Protect Yourself from the Silent Treatment

  1. Recognize it for what it is—a manipulative tool to break you down.
  2. Resist the urge to chase them—they want you to beg for their attention.
  3. Surround yourself with support—talk to trusted friends, family, or a trauma-informed counselor.
  4. Go no contact—don’t wait around for them to come back and hurt you again.
  5. Focus on your healing—you deserve love, respect, and emotional safety.

You Deserve Better

If someone is deliberately ignoring you to punish and control you, that’s abuse. You don’t have to tolerate it. If you’re struggling with narcissistic abuse, I’m here to help.