Fake Love and Flying Monkeys

How Narcissists Use Projection to Blame and Confuse You

Nova Gibson Season 2 Episode 50

If you’ve ever found yourself being accused of things you didn’t do, or being labelled with traits that clearly belong to the narcissist themselves, chances are you’ve experienced this toxic psychological trick firsthand. In this powerful episode, we explore one of the most insidious tactics narcissists use to manipulate and emotionally destabilise their victims – projection

Projection is a defence mechanism that allows narcissists to avoid taking accountability for their actions. Instead of owning up to their own flaws, behaviours, or toxic attitudes, they shift the blame onto you. Suddenly, you’re the one who’s "too sensitive," "selfish," "lying," or "manipulative." It’s a calculated move designed not only to confuse and disarm you, but to make you question your own reality and integrity.

We break down exactly how and why narcissists project, with real-world examples drawn from counselling sessions, survivor stories, and lived experiences. You’ll learn how this tactic often shows up in narcissistic relationships – from romantic partners and parents to workplace bullies and toxic friends – and the emotional toll it takes on victims.

This episode also highlights the emotional confusion and cognitive dissonance that projection creates. Narcissists are masters at using it to gaslight and distort the truth, making it incredibly difficult for victims to identify what’s real. We’ll talk about the circular arguments, the deflection, and the rage that often accompanies projection when you dare to stand up for yourself or question their narrative.

We also unpack why narcissists rely so heavily on projection. Whether it’s to preserve their fragile ego, avoid guilt, or maintain their false self-image, projection serves as a smokescreen that keeps the narcissist in control while leaving you doubting yourself.

If you’ve ever felt like you were being punished for someone else’s behaviour, made to feel responsible for the narcissist’s emotions, or gaslit into silence by relentless accusations, this episode is a must-listen. Understanding projection is a crucial step in unravelling the narcissist’s manipulation and reclaiming your voice, clarity, and confidence.

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Please remember the information in this episode is not intended to substitute for therapy is general and strictly the opinions of the host.

Nova xx

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