Fake Love and Flying Monkeys

7 Delusions All Narcissists Believe (And Why It’s Crazy-Making!)

Nova Gibson Season 2 Episode 73

Do narcissists actually believe the stuff they say? 

(For 1 on 1 online counselling in your own toxic relationship/narcissistic abuse recovery please visit my website at
https://brighteroutlookcounselling.com.au/online-counselling-services/ )

In this episode of Fake Love and Flying Monkeys, I break down 7 of the most common—and most mind-bending—delusions all narcissists believe.

This is the deep dive every survivor needs to hear if you’ve ever found yourself:

Arguing with someone who rewrites reality in real time

Wondering if you’re actually the one who’s “too sensitive”

Shocked at how confidently they lie about you.

If you're exhausted from trying to reason with someone who lives in their own fantasyland, this episode will feel like a warm cup of clarity.

📚 Grab your copy of Fake Love—the must-read guide for breaking free from narcissistic abuse and toxic relationships https://mybook.to/F3gm

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Nova xx

7 Delusions All Narcissists Seriously Believe

Today we’re diving headfirst into something both infuriating and (let’s be honest) borderline comical — the seven delusions that all narcissists believe. And when I say “believe,” I mean believe. Not surface-level thoughts. These are core, deep-in-their-soul (if they had one) beliefs that shape how they treat you, how they see themselves, and how they move through the world.

And spoiler alert: none of it has anything to do with actual reality.

These aren’t just quirks or personality flaws. These are full-blown, detached-from-reality, red-flag-waving-in-the-wind delusions that can make dealing with a narcissist feel like living in a psychological funhouse—except no one’s laughing.

Let’s break them down.

1. "I'm always the victim."

Oh yes. This is the narcissist's holy grail of delusions. No matter what’s going on, they are always the one who has been wronged.

You could catch them cheating red-handed. Like, literally mid-act. And they’ll still spin it around and blame you. Suddenly it’s your fault because you were too clingy. Or not fun anymore. Or, who knows, your face reminded them of their ex. So naturally, they had to find spiritual healing in someone else’s private parts.

Their ability to reframe any situation where they're clearly at fault into a sob story about how they’ve been wronged is Olympic level. It’s like they’re constantly auditioning for the role of “poor misunderstood soul” in the movie of their life.

Here’s how it plays out: You finally work up the courage to confront them after they’ve ignored you for two weeks with the silent treatment. And they hit you with:
 “I just can’t talk to you when you’re like this. You’re too emotional.”
Translation? Your tears are messing up their manipulation game.

2. "People are either my fan or my enemy."

There is no in-between. You’re either there to admire them or you’re a threat. That’s it.

Narcissists don’t do relationships. They assign roles. You might be their cheerleader, their therapist, their scapegoat, their emotional punching bag — and yes, they’ll swap you between these roles faster than they change their story.

The lovely co-worker who complimented your new haircut? Threat.
 Your lifelong best friend who’s not buying into their crap? Huge threat.
 Your therapist who uses words like “boundaries”? Public enemy number one.

Boundaries are a narcissist’s kryptonite. Not because they don’t understand them — but because they know boundaries mean they don’t have control over you. And nothing triggers their inner tyrant more than losing control.

3. "I'm the smartest person in the room."

This one would be hilarious if it weren’t so exhausting.

Narcissists genuinely believe they are smarter, sharper, and more insightful than anyone else in the room — even when they’re Googling how to spell "narcissist" (and still get it wrong). Street smart, book smart, emotionally intelligent — they’ve assigned themselves every merit badge.

But heaven forbid you challenge them with facts. Suddenly, you're attacking them. You’re "disrespecting" them. You’re "jealous of their brilliance." Cue the tantrum. Cue the sulking. Cue the gaslighting rage.

They’ll argue with basic facts like “water is wet” or “the sky is blue” — and do it with complete confidence. You start questioning your sanity not because you're wrong, but because they're so convincing in their wrongness.

4. "I don’t need to change. You do."

Personal growth? Who’s she?

To a narcissist, self-reflection feels like a personal attack. Why would they need to go to therapy when you’re the one overreacting to their lies, gaslighting, and betrayal?

And if you ever do suggest they seek help, the response is usually:
 “You’re the one with issues, not me.”
Right. Because expecting loyalty and kindness is apparently an emotional disorder now.

They genuinely see themselves as the finished product. The blueprint for how others should behave. And if there's conflict in the relationship? It’s because you failed the assignment. Not them.

They’ll throw out lines like:
 “You’re too sensitive.”
Or
“Stop trying to change me. This is just who I am.”
As if being emotionally unavailable and cruel is some kind of flex.

5. "The rules don’t apply to me."

This one? Dangerous.

Narcissists believe they are exempt from rules — all rules. Relationship boundaries, social norms, even actual laws — those are for other people. Mere mortals. Not them.

They’ll lie, cheat, betray, and then act completely stunned when you dare to be upset.
 “Why are you making such a big deal out of it?”
Because... it is a big deal?

They expect you to follow all the rules — be loyal, be available, forgive them constantly — but don’t expect them to return the favour. They’ll hold grudges like it’s their full-time job but demand instant forgiveness from you.

And if you finally walk away? You’re the villain now. How dare you not keep tolerating their crap?

6. "My emotions are facts. Yours are manipulation."

This one will have you questioning your reality.

To a narcissist, their feelings are gospel. If they feel abandoned, it means you betrayed them. If they feel disrespected, then clearly you crossed a line. Never mind that you were just existing, breathing air, and living your life.

But when you have an emotion? You're being dramatic. Manipulative. Controlling.

You could literally be crying after they ghosted you for three weeks, and they’ll say:
 “You’re trying to use emotion to control me.”
Meanwhile, they’ll lose it if you don’t reply to a text within 10 minutes.

Your feelings are always too much — unless they can be used to fuel their ego. Then suddenly, they're all ears. Until they’re not.

7. "Everyone wants to be me."

Yes, they actually believe this.

Even if they’re not doing anything particularly interesting with their lives, narcissists live in a fantasy where the entire world is obsessed with them. They’re the trendsetter, the main character, the ultimate “it” person.

Envy is one of the nine hallmark traits of narcissistic personality disorder — both feeling it and assuming everyone else feels it toward them.

You get a promotion? You’re copying them.
 You buy a new car? You’re trying to compete with them.
 You change your hair? You’re clearly obsessed.

They’ve basically turned your normal life decisions into a personal threat. And this bizarre delusion fuels so much of their sabotage — especially toward people they see as rivals, like close friends, siblings, or coworkers. If they can’t be the most admired person in the room (even if it’s just you and a houseplant), they will tear others down to maintain the illusion.

So, are they really delusional?

Yes — but let’s get something straight. When we say they’re delusional, we’re not saying they’re unaware.

They know what they’re doing. They know when they’re twisting the truth, when they’re gaslighting, when they’re punishing you with the silent treatment. They just don’t care. Because empathy isn’t part of the package.

And here’s your biggest clue: they only act like this behind closed doors. When others are watching? They can turn the charm on like a light switch. That means they have control — they just reserve the worst of their behavior for you.

Final Thoughts

If you’ve been on the receiving end of these delusions, you know how maddening it feels. How you start questioning reality. How your self-esteem gets chipped away bit by bit. And how hard it is to get clarity or justice from someone who rewrites the truth to protect their ego.

So let me say this loud and clear — you’re not crazy. You’re not overreacting. You’re not too sensitive.

You’re just seeing the truth. And the narcissist? Well… they can’t handle that.
But you can. And you will.

Need support?
I offer one-on-one online counseling for survivors of narcissistic abuse. If you're ready to break free from confusion and start rebuilding, book a session with me here.

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